The Geezer, my human, is working on his Christmas lists. That’s wish lists for his friends, acquaintances, and himself. I think he forwards them to Santa Claus for action. It seems to work most of the time, so as I recognize someone’s needs, I’ve decided to write them down each day. Between now and Christmas I’ll whisk the note off to the fat human, dressed in red, with the facial hair. Here’s my first request.
I can attest to the following people’s good behavior and would like you to leave them presents under the tree Christmas morning-
For Sarge, the neighborhood German Shepard. A pair of blinders and a portable cold shower so he doesn’t get into trouble every time Fifi the poodle walks by. His child support is getting sizeable.
For Kim Kardashian’s dog. (I assume all humans have canines to guide them.) Send cash so the dog can buy the woman some clothes. From the pictures I’ve seen, she can’t afford them.
For the teenage girl down the street – Blinds for her windows.
For the seven teenage boys in the neighborhood – Binoculars, if you don’t bring the girl blinds.
For Oreo, my feline house companion – guardrails for the aquarium so he doesn’t fall in while watching the fish. Again.