I need to save the Geezer from himself! They are making a regional TV commercial for the introduction of his latest novel, The Bait Man. He is planning to be the featured face in the ad … like he’s doing signings at one of the book stores that sell his books. Mistake! Who wants to look at DL? He looks like a cross between the Pillsbury Dough-boy and Santa Claus.
The Bait Man has real mystic about it … class … suspense … pizzazz … flair. That book calls for a top of the line countenance to represent it. It needs to be me in the shoot! Look at my face. See the class and charisma I exude? Sneak a peek at the Geezer. What you see there is boring balderdash.
He says they want him signing a copy of the book in the ad. I’ve explained that I can sit in a chair and hold a pen in my paw. No problem. He doesn’t have to say anything, the whole commercial is done using a professional voice-over, so he can’t complain about my bark. The publisher tells him he has to be in the commercial, or so he says. If he was modest, like me, I might believe him. He just wants to hide my starlet looks from the public I should have. Woe is me.
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