Glory! Hallelujah! I’m glad I’m a dog!


It’s discouraging to know that when you go home with your human they’re as smart as they will ever be…….

I watched my human as he struggled with numerous government agencies and insurance companies trying to straighten out the mess hurricane Irma created for him. It’s times like these I so happy that I’m canine, not human. He is so miserable, I’m not. I got to thinking about many of the reasons I’m glad I’m not human. Here are some of the many reasons I’m happy to be a dog.

  • I don’t have to wear clothes. My coat is an all-weather garment. I don’t need a closet full of expensive stuff I only wear once in a while. Fur is always in style.
  • April 15th is just another day to me. No thoughts of suicide or robbing banks.
  • All the things I enjoy are free. No car payments … no boat payments … no credit card payments for last night’s dinner out or that new fishing pole. A stick, an old shoe and being scratched behind my ears don’t cost me anything.
  • I don’t own a phone. When I watch TV, go for ride in the boat, or eat … I’m not constantly interrupted by someone wanting money for The Society to Preserve the Rights of Left-handed Pregnant Male Zombies.
  • I don’t have to go to college to have evidence I was born with a brain.
  • Since humans have decided to take the “news” out of them, I can once again put the New York Times and other big newspapers to good uses, like emergency toilet facilities or to wrap garbage.
  • Nothing I have has to have insurance. Why pay money to a company to tell you that what you paid for isn’t covered because the damage wasn’t caused by the Tooth Fairy.
  • I can feel free to like or dislike any dog on this planet without being called a “dogist” and having old Rin Tin Tin movies burnt in the park.
  • Unlike humans I feel no need to blame my bad-breath and farts on other species I live with.
  • My canine friends consider my ability to smell birds, or bark loudest, or chase a squirrel up a tree, or pee on every dandelion in the yard more important than my AKC papers, where my mom and dad were from, and the color of my coat.
  • I never have the desire to half-straggle someone I claim to love and drag them around with a rope.

 

 

Wow! I’m glad I’m a dog! To all you humans … Try to have a nice day.

 

#  #  #  #  #

15 thoughts on “Glory! Hallelujah! I’m glad I’m a dog!

  1. When I’m getting ready to take the dogs out in the mornings Rufus follows me to the cupboard to get my coat and backpack, then into the utility room for my boots. He then stands very close whilst I’m putting everything on, I tell him “It’s all right for you two, you already have your coats and boots on, I have to get ready” 🙂

  2. hello sandy its dennis the vizsla dog hay yes i do hav to say it is pritty gud to be a dog!!! hyoomans hav way too mutch stress!!! but after living with the hipsters for a wile i think maybe it is eeven less stressful to be a kitty then to be a dog!!! ok bye

  3. i hope your human got things sorted. insurance is an annoying game – but necessary. seems the only way you can ‘win’ is to suffer a ‘loss’. this is especially vexing when you think about life insurance. you pay, and you pay, and you pay – and if you live longer than statistics dictate, you LOSE because you pay more than what you put in. So to win, you’ve got to die young? Yeah. It’s good to be a dog…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s